The stories in this blog are first draft stories with minimal editing, sort of like a practice blog.

Saturday, 23 January 2016

Retroviral Chronicles part 6- The Drunk and the Confused.

“O boy why you fuck up like that na?”

“Bros why you dey talk like that?”

“Jesse, I say you eff up anyhow” Osato’s rising voice attracted significant attention in the crowded bar.

“See guy, my babe just surprise me. In fact na shock she give me and my brain no boot fast enough to give am better story.”

Osato reached for his glass, gulped down his beer and set it down. Jesse avoided his eyes and Peter cleared his throat, Peter was the third member of the Three Musketeers.

But seriously guy, how much are condoms that you had to use your babes condoms on other girls? E no pure jare and I agree with Osato, in fact I concur say you fuck up big time” Peter piped in.

Guys I don’t need all this medicine after death analysis, please help me get my babe back because I cannot lose her o”

  Osato’s phone rang and when he saw the caller’s name on the screen of his phone he smiled and left the table.

Woman wrapper” Peter shouted and Osato gave him a middle finger salute.

So tell me how this all went down” Peter said and Jesse exhaled.

Ok it started like this, I met a girl so delicious with all her curves on point that she got my juices pumping”

“And you forgot that you had a girlfriend, right?” Peter cut in

Mr Goody-goody, I didn’t remember that it’s water that flows through your veins”

“Well, you can call me any name that you like but if Martha was my girl, I wouldn’t even look at another woman talkless of being tempted.

  A small chill ran down Jesse’s back at his words, he’d always suspected that his friend had a crush on his girlfriend and he knew that they had a connection that he didn’t quite have with her. She brightened anytime she saw Peter and they could spend hours discussing their favourite books and the books they were reading currently.

Mehn guess what!” Osato’s excited voice derailed Jesse’s depressing train of thought.
Which babe agreed to come and spend the weekend in your house?” Peter asked

“Must it be babe matter?” Osato said with the beginnings of a cute pout forming on his lips.

Oya tell us the gist and let us judge whether it is not babe matter” Jesse ended his words with a sad laugh.

I won’t tell you guys again, I’ll keep my luscious, succulent gist to myself” Peter and Jesse burst into laughter at his statement.

Ok it’s Patricia, she made rice with sea food sauce and she kept a big bowl for me which I can share with you both if I like.”

“Patricia for President!” Jesse said

See you shouting Patricia for President instead of looking for a way to save your relationship” Peter scoffed.

Buy her a dozen roses and she will melt jare” Osato said.

Jesse’s phone rang and the ringtone was Strong thing by Banky W, it was his special ringtone for Martha.

He picked the call, stood up and made his way to the entrance of the bar where it was less noisy.

“You’re in the bar right? Alcohol has always been your emotional clutch” was her opening statement.

 He couldn’t say anything, the weight of shame of shame deadened his tongue.

“Cat got your tongue?” she asked and without waiting for an answer she told him that she’d called to break up with him because she couldn’t trust him.

Baby I’m sorry” he said.

I am too” she replied “But you are putting me at risk of HIV with your multiple partners”

But I use condoms with all of you” he said before he could think the words through.

While I find that a little admirable, I cannot stand a man who cheats. You know it’s a deal breaker for me, I told you from day one.

Patricia said you might do this”

“Pa what!” her voice rose, “how come you were discussing us with Patricia?”

“Sweetheart please” he began but Martha had already cut the call.

He turned back to the bar to get his friends, he had to save his relationship NOW.

 Many thanks to the graced misfit for the push to continue this series.


  1. Ypu write really well. Each of the characters seem so real.
    Is Jesse selfish or what?!
    And many thanks to you for the 'sharoute'.:-) I appreciate it and I'm glad I helped small.


    1. Thanks for your kind words and constant support for this series, I couldn't have done this without you.

  2. Jesse is just silly!!
    "But I use condom with all of you?!" Really? Yeye guy!
    Martha , biko walk away .

    1. He really is and his mouth has no filter too. I hope she walks away though, I don't like Jesse.

  3. Lol @his mouth has no filter.


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